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I Spy For the F B I

Who sang that song, "I Spy" from like 1986 or so? The cover of the album had a guy in a fedora or something. "I spy for the FBI, I spy for the CIA, I spy for MI5..."

Once again, I feel the need to make it perfectly clear that not all of the intelligence community is James Bond. I just got an absolutely hilarious phone call today, telling me that I was in the CIA and knew hitmen. Sorry, I don't know any hitmen. I wasn't in the CIA. In fact, I don't know anyone in the CIA even today. I know folks in the NSA, in NIMA, and some other acronym agencies no doubt, but nobody in the CIA.

I was in military intelligence for 12 years. You know how much excitement I saw? None. I read some cool stuff, heard a few interesting things on the radio, but never saw or did anything cool. Sure, going into a blast-proof bunker 3 stories underground may sound neat, but it was just another dark air-conditioned room full of computers and geeks.

Today, I work for a defense contractor and still talk to intelligence geeks. Yesterday and today I had to assist in briefing some high muckety-mucks from D.C. My job was clicking the button to make the powerpoint slides advance on cue. I'm an overpaid audio-visual lab geek now. At least they pay me more than the army did.

But, I still don't know who to call to have someone killed. Hell, I only got to fire my rifle in the army annually.

Last month, I hung around with Special Forces Command geeks (not green berets, the support team), next month I get to hang around with imagery geeks, in August or September I get to go on a ship and hang around with signal geeks. Lots of geeks, still no James Bond. We're mainly really mild-mannered, bespectacled dweebs. You know the guys that read Slashdot at work? That's us.

Sorry to burst anyone's bubble. Real life is actually a lot duller than fiction in this case.


( 3 comments — Leave a comment )
Jun. 28th, 2002 07:50 am (UTC)
Launch.yahoo.com lists about 58 different songs called "I Spy", including one from the Dead Kennedys. So, I thought I could help you, but I can't even begin to figure out which one is the one you want! :)
Jun. 28th, 2002 08:12 am (UTC)
I Spy for the FBI
I just found it. The Untouchables, a ska band that had just that one "hit" in the U.S.
Jun. 28th, 2002 08:38 am (UTC)
Re: I Spy for the FBI
Ah, they were on that list. They were even one of the ones I clicked, but no dates were listed, so I couldn't figure out it they were who you wanted. Guess they were!
( 3 comments — Leave a comment )